Tag Archive | Humor

my rude iWatch

I have come to the conclusion that my iwatch and I are frenemies.

Maybe it knows that I don’t think it is a good pedometer?

Maybe it is vexed that I constantly let it run out of power?

Maybe it is actually possessed by a minor daemon that at best is passive aggressive?

 

First of all, I have plenty of good things to say about the iWatch.  It is stylish, it is waterproof, it keeps time very well, I like seeing my text messages blip onto my wrist.  It is extremely handy for finding my phone because the ‘ping’ feature will make the phone make a noise even if it is on silent and I can track it down.  I’m constantly leaving my phone in interesting places because women’s clothing does not have pockets.  I also love being able to answer my phone via watch because of the aforementioned lack of keeping track of the actual phone.  Plenty of good, plenty really, just a few little things that point to passive-aggressive wrist daemon.

  1. This all started with is ‘suggesting’ that I get up, as in, I’ve been sitting too long.  I really do not sit long in my days, constantly getting up for something is my normal, so I actually get the also annoying message “good job! you stood up!” about 6x a day.
  2. Reminding me randomly that I’ve some time in the past done more walking/standing/workout by this time.  This would not really be annoying except for the fact that it seems seriously random.  It is NOT a good pedometer, I have not hit 10k steps while wearing it nearly ever when I would routinely get 10k steps in a smaller house and working out less frequently.  I’m ok with it not being good at that but it should just drop the pretense.
  3. It tells me to ‘calm down’.  You know the theory that nobody ever actually calms down for being told to…  well if my heart rate spikes it suggests “I spend a few minutes breathing deeply”.  I did not ask for this feature!  (BTW, excellent heart rate monitor).  So I’m mad about something and then my watch buzzes telling me I’m mad at something, how is this helpful?

This was my list that was on the annoying side but like an understanding friend, I just let the quirks roll off my back.  Sometime in the past week, two new charming features started up;

First, when a text comes in you have the option to reply via watch with some pre-canned options, an emoji, or, a little writing screen.  I’ve used it, it is useful, but this past week it started auto texting back “no” all by itself.  I swear I didn’t touch it, I read it, but didn’t touch the screen but then a moment later get a reply from my friend acknowledging my dissent.  this happened 3 times so far.  my friends are understanding and I can quickly reply that the real answer is XYZ and even if it includes a negative, I’m much nicer than a 1-word answer BUT MY WATCH IS NOT.

The next thing I probably have something to do with.  I activated the sleep tracker to see how I’m sleeping.  It was something I loved on the Fitbit and I miss the data.  Somehow this watch is very confused because it reports to me that I sleep very soundly about 15 hours a day; from 7am until 10pm.  This is when I’m AWAKE and you should know that watch because you are constantly congratulating me on standing up.  How does it think I am sleeping soundly (ie not moving/low heart rate) when I’m also working out and walking and generally, you know, moving?  I’m turning this bit of rudeness off, it is like telling me “yawn, you did nothing, you might as well have been asleep…”  Rude watch! I’m doing what I can!

Somehow I still put it on every day and since a friend gave me a stand for it (that I love!) I’ve gotten 99% better at charging it regardless of our differences.  I’ll keep using it because the good does outweigh the bad.  Seriously though, I already have sassy children, I don’t need the watch chiming in.

Other Kate!

3 in a row!  Don’t get spoiled people 😉

I know at least 1 reader out there adores the ongoing saga of my Other Kates.  I’ve collected a few over the past couple months that together make a fun post.

Recently AUKate has generously offered to cover for a coworker, I’m assuming for a good reason like having a baby but who knows with Australia, they get something like 20 weeks of vacation a year.  Anyway, I’m alerted to this by the normal method of reading her misdirected mail.  This alone was not going to make a post but I just got another fun one for her.

AUKate is cordially invited to a holiday party…. in November.  Save the date!  Technically *I* was invited since the invite came to me and a BCC list of what I can only assume are fellow Doctors and Staff but who knows, maybe her hospital is throwing a random invite international party?  Why else give 11 months notice other than to allow for travel.  I should really show up to one of these parties I get invited to.  They don’t give too much info but they do say there will be a dinner, tempting, I’ll see if they follow up with notes about entertainment or an open bar.

UK-Kate has been quiet lately except she signed up for StitchFix and even loaded up her credit card info but not her address and somehow used my email as the login.  I was asked, very nicely via email, to fill in a survey so they could accommodate my taste.  The temptation to go wild was there, but, I’m not that kind of Kate.  I hope she got it straight and they don’t just send her generic stuff.  I did dig a little to see if I could find her actual address on the site but that section was not visible and so I did the kindest thing and unsubscribe saying I didn’t ask for this.  Maybe somebody will call her or something, I do hope UK Kate gets the fashion she desires, my sister loves the service.

Thus completes my semi-regular update on the people who accidentally use my email address.

Other Kate continues

In my list on Monday, I actually forgot that I have been saving up some Other Kate material.  I almost feel bad because at this point AUKate is like a friend.

(check the “Other Kate” tag for more on the story but basically I have a common email address so I get other peoples mail accidentally but way more frequently then you think)

In this episode of Other Kate, she gets a new boss.  The Australian heroine we already know is a fancy doctor, my reader who loves this storyline best should know that ironically, AUKate could work at her hospital as that is her practice area.  Anyway, in a very mass email, the new “acting” CEO of the hospital introduces himself.  I feel that is a nice way to reach out to everyone, good move hospital administrator.  Good luck though because your name was not followed by an ‘MD’ or a ‘PhD’ and the adjective ‘acting’ isn’t really a recipe for respect.

I forward it to the right address with no comment, AUKate, she can decide if she wants to ignore him or send him cookies.  I don’t know what doctors or Australians do.

A few weeks later, Mr. NewGuy, writes to inform that someone has resigned after years in the position.  Intrigue?  Did this person leave in a huff because she was passed over? Was she fired for some soap opera reason? Is Mr. NewGuy a really bad boss because you know, you don’t quit a job, you quit a boss….  The person who left was named Fiona and of course, that struck a note with me.  I sent along the email and this time added a note about my Fiona, because AUKate is my friend now, and also let her know that maybe she can tell Mr. NewGuy her real address.  She is super nice and replied saying she didn’t know this Fiona, likes mine, and wonder why people still get these things wrong!

As an aside – AUKate also gets stalked by drug reps and people wanting her to participate in studies.  They get one forward each and then they are direct to the trash.  We, Kates, stick together to avoid spam.

Blog posting month

Status

Weather; Fall again, feel the chill

Kids; 100% in school today

Workout; 1 bodypump class today and maybe I’ll walk to get that elusive 10k steps

health; heard a dishearting rattle in a sudden cough that was not there yesterday…

calories; resisting the candy.  Not resisting a cookie for breakfast.

 

Here I am again!  In my old job there was a predictable season for all sorts of thing.  The time I would send this or budget that or schedule the other…  One of my odd worries when I started to stay home was that I would lose that rhythm to the year.  I was wrong. Plenty of things.  There were the expected holiday and birthday things that roll around like clockwork but those were already a given.  Things like posting every day in November is oddly like when I would review the prices of every item in my zone of influence.  It is nice to have built a new framework, there is basically no dull time in the year, no time when I’m just doing the same thing week after week with no variation.  I think I actually have more variation now than I did at the mundane job!

On the other hand, posting every day the topics start to get thin.  I have not decided if I’ll go with a theme or jump onto the prompts they send out daily or if I’ll fall back on my routine prompts from last year.  Each have merit and I guess we will find out tomorrow!  One thing is for sure, its going to get a bit random because I am using all my strategy and planning on the 5 other blogs and web presences I’m managing right now!

 

In the vain of random, here is a picture of Niamh in a shirt she was given when she was 3.  It says ‘my dad rocks’ and has been in her wardrobe ever since.  The friends that gave it to her are expecting their first baby in March but back then just had no concept of kid sizes – soon they will laugh at themselves (more, because they laughed in the first place too).

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ps.  I just remembered I could have gotten away with just a picture today as ‘wordless Wednesday’  oh well, I just can’t keep my days straight when my Monday is off balance.

Wisely using my child free time

Today I have actually done so many of the things my head says one should do .

 

  • Got up a little early to read and snuggle with Niamh
  • I made healthy lunches for kids
  • ate breakfast on the go, but, ate breakfast
  • dropped off and hugged 5 kids at school
  • worked out with a friend who totally made the workout possible by pulling out equipment for me too
  • Showered!  before noon!
  • met up with friends for an hour
  • took a 1 mile walk where I got 5 pokimon
  • Finished an awesome biography on Birdseye
  • ate lunch with my husband
  • answered a few pressing e-mails
  • did a work call

And now I look toward a major project – swapping kid rooms – that I’ve been trying to get underway for weeks.  The bed is here, the mattress arrived this afternoon, I cleaned the kitchen last night so that’s still good and I have a ‘free’ hour before my first sewing lesson student arrives.

This week has been decent in rhythm.  I’m working out more if not at normal/regular times.  I can spend time with the kids doing individual things because I can get some of the annoying chore things done faster solo.  Work is increasing since I’m onboarding a new client so I have way more setup work than normal but its also fun.  I still need to work out my computer time because if I’m not with Fiona I tend to work all day non stop and if I’m with Fiona I can’t break away as regularly as I used to.  I’ll get that dialed in sooner or later 🙂

So thats my life right now.  I need to do some posts on projects I’m working on because the big Halloween holiday is coming and we have a few new hobbies going that are totally worth talking about but I’m too busy doing to get writing.

Hope you all have a great weekend.  Mine will involve a chainsaw!

Fall fun

Status

Weather – awesome, this is why we live here

School – everyone still likes it

Cat – getting a check up next week

Workouts – need to get better, I’m hopeful

Schedule – full throttle already

 

I don’t know how long it will take me to get used to my new schedule but right now I’m filling every moment with things that have been patiently waiting their turn forever.  I estimate I have a year worth of projects in and around the house and that isn’t even counting walls I want to paint or demo (or both!).  This week the focus was on getting some of the computer things done so all day today and most of Monday I plugged away at reports and writeups and reviews and research and I think most of Friday I’ll be here too.  I did at least book tickets to Hawaii to see my sister, that only took me 6 months to actually do.  I also got all my Pennsic task list done so that is in the books.

On the flip side, now that I have some day time, I actually have more time for the kids when they get home.  This is augmented by the new awesome homework policy (that is NO HOMEWORK!) so over the past few afternoons, we have tackled the bike situation.  Niamh was so dependent on her training wheels that she was actually bending the frame of her bike because she was torquing it so oddly riding sideways.  We should have made this happen years ago but she was not overly interested in biking and we always just had other things to do.  I just took them away.  I also lowered her seat and told her to pretend it was a sit on scooter so she could just learn how to balance.  I also figured that I should not make the same mistake twice so I also took away Zoe’s training wheels and told her the same thing.  Both actually got into it and since we live on a road with a slight hill it was easy enough to get the balance trick.

The only problem with ignoring petals is that they don’t go away.  I know there are fancy balance bikes but I was not investing anything but time in this project.  So, because of frequent whacks with the petals to the shins, both girls choose to put their feet on them.  What do you know, 2 days of half an hour or so of walking with them and they got it.  Niamh is mad Zoe did it, but, Niamh is actually getting better 10x faster and Zoe is about where a 6-year-old should be.  She needs to learn about breaks, not just going up on a lawn but on the plus side, all those years of jujitsu falling down is not a big deal for her.

I remember bikes being a giant part of my childhood and I hope they have the same positive experience too.  I’m also glad that I could teach them something that didn’t come naturally to either one…  Zoe asked today if we could ride bikes this afternoon and I’m happy to say yes and I’m happy that she asked.

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Oh, and this maniac on 3 wheels is now teasing them both that she can ride circles around them.  She can actually, for now, but not for long!