I always love that blogging daily in November means a good opportunity to publically remember my wedding day.
Today I’m a tad distracted with the election but I’m glad we get this weekend to celebrate.
It does not feel like 14 years but we have done a lot in that time;
a house built
a house sold
a variety of pets
a million miles traveled
and all the little things that truly make up our life like the fact you make me coffee, you learned how to cook for us, you research fun topics and you find me dumb jokes (that I love) all the time. You help me have fun, you support my crazy plans, you are my biggest advocate in most things. I love that you do the dishes even though you hate them because I hate them more.
I hope we never stop learning and growing and loving each other.
Happy Anniversary honey
The post-Lars part of our time in NY is nearly over but we have made the most of it. My family and friends in NY have been great and I’ve enjoyed seeing who we can see. The kids have not been to bed near bedtime in days and there has been tons of visiting and driving. We haven’t done anything ‘grand’ and vacation like other than the trip to the cloisters, however, I love our playground time with friends and backyard bbq and just being around people.
Last weekend we did adventure out to NJ to a family birthday for my great aunt’s 90’th birthday and informal family reunion. I’m reminded I actually do have relatives in MN and also MI and it is on me that I have not seen more of them. Well, can only go forward and do better when we get back. The funny part of the party was seeing how tall I am compared to my ethnically Maltese family, as island people they just top out at 5ft tall, so I tower above them.
Sunday, fathers day, we face timed with Lars and went sailing with dad and in between hung out and brunched with high school friends who have all become great parents in their own rights. Monday we had to wait for kids to actually wake up and then we went to my sister Josie’s house where we generally hung out and started to build the most annoying shed ever. I told Lars about it that night and he reminded me of when a friend got so frustrated at a shed he was building that he destroyed it in a fit of rage Hulk style and now I understand why. It was still fun to just have a day with my sister doing normal stuff. Our Monday evening plans were 20 min away at Miss Math’s house where we ate dinner and kids played and we talked and her husband hid to avoid the girl talk. Another late night but worth it!
Yesterday I tried to find hardware for the house but the place we went was more disorganized showroom than a place to find a deal but Miss Math joined me so it was worth the trip. Then to make sure there was fun in the day, we went to find the ice cream truck. Note I say “go find” because in NY they roam the streets and if you EVER come out of your house you get a permanent star on his route map and that truck will come back 5x a day all summer. Unless you want a daily discussion about ice cream and its relation to dinner/lunch/cash/diet never let the truck know where you live. The park was lovely and there was shade and a breeze and #3 godfather made an appearance and the kids got icecream sticky and we were just walking home when we met up with Aunt Josie (I had her kids) and home we went to meet more friends for games and eat dinner.
Today was a grand day where things just fell into place. Our original plans fell through so we were gifted use of a state park pass and a 75 degree and sunny day to use it. Niamh was the late sleeper today so we were just about ready to go when my dad had a break in his day so we kidnapped him to go walk a couple miles on the beach. We did the boardwalk and then up the lighthouse and back along the beach splashing in the Atlantic. It was just the perfect size outing for the beach and we got home just in time to get Chase from school and for Miss Math to pop in for a quick visit. We went over to my aunts for a general garden tour and play time and ended up doing dinner and seeing my cousin who usually works far later. Josie met up with us (I had her kids again) and back to grandma’s for our first quiet evening in ages. I plan on going out to see another friend tonight and starting the packing process because after tomorrow we hit the road again for vacation part 3; the road trip home.
Tomorrow should be a good one, our plans include seeing friends one more time, dinner on the big boat, and a cousin sleepover so get every last moment together. Somewhere in that time I need to find all our stuff and get it back in a car shaped package and point my brain back at the things that need doing to get us home again.
2 in a row! Go me! See my post yesterday for the full intro, here is the mini version and my second entry of three.
Rules; Thank the person who challenged you, post a quote, tag 3 others, for 3 days in a row.
Thank you, Fancy Paper – and a double thanks for introducing a new active blog group that isn’t full of people just doing ‘selling stuff’ posts. A few of those, no big deal, however 100% polish corporate blog is not all that fun to read.
Love is patient, love is kind
I’m not super religious but this quote from 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (RC Bible) and virtually every wedding I’ve been to is less about a religion and more about the nature of love. Like how kleenex is technically a brand but we all use it in reference to disposable nose blowing receptacles. Love is a big concept, it covers everything from a treat to the person you spend your life with to the children you produce to the best pair of boots ever. We use the word liberally in my world.
However… Love is also hard and involves choices. Things happen with kids and spouses and houses and projects when you need to take a breath and remember that love is patient, and, love is kind.
Tagging 3 people who I hope join in;
Talking to myself – this is a person I know in real life and hopefully, this tag inspires him to write a word or 5.
Knotty Heart – another real-life friend who is blogging their brewing adventures, and, their cats.
Shanna Hatfield – an author I started following because she is just fun to read, and, someday I wish I could write something that would be published.
This is a nice departure from house house house house…. Thanks again Fancy 🙂
This year Easter is early, and, right in the last 3 miles of the marathon of getting this house ready. The goal is Wednesday. Truly the goal is Tuesday night so Wednesday all I need to do is a tidy after they depart for school and then hold my breath until it is sold.
I’m sure you all have experienced the chaos that is the third quarter of a project, everything is torn up and you have been working and working and still, it looks 10x worse than when you started? That was our Friday and Saturday. Sunday, we started to actually pull it back together and our house is getting truly ‘done’.
Friends convinced me I did not need to change every doorknob, at least not yet…
I convinced Lars we HAD to either repaint the master or color match it so I could touch up three spots that look like the size of Africa to me but in reality are the comparative size of Fiji. He dutifully went to home depot 2x to get paint and now I’m painting my house with a tiny paintbrush. The Lars list is very long, he has done so much I just don’t put it all here. There was a time on Friday that I couldn’t help thinking how well we actually work together on big stressful projects as our storage trip was suddenly our mini date.
We finally finished the painting in the 2 rooms we were repainting and then I facetimed with my family while scrubbing the trim and floors to get all the tiny paint spots clean. Good thing Magic Erasers were on sale last week, I’ve disintegrated 4 already between walls and floors.
In the breaks between cleaning, we did a little thing called Easter. It was very mellow for us this year and I’m pretty glad it actually fell on April Fools. In the end I handled lack of traditional baskets (in storage) with 3 decorative boxes and then I hid them in the closet and made them a giant basket of socks. Zoe was first up and exploring and found the fake basket and remarked: “at least there is some candy” and then the clever girl found a bag of trash. The living room was early on the hit list so it is pretty clean and decluttered overall and I forgot to dispose of the evidence of basket treats and Zoe found it. Don’t worry, she still believes, maybe even more now because she considered it a mix of a trick and a clue that there were REAL easter baskets somewhere. I’m pretty proud of the way this shook out and I got to hear the sounds of joy when they found them.
This year, due to snow, we hid eggs in the house. Growing up we nearly always had indoor egg hunts but this is the first year weather was bad so it was a new twist for our kids. I think we had about 150 eggs and 3 kids so for a solid 20min they were searching. Easy ones were passed 100 times, hard ones found instantly, in the end, we might be short 2 real eggs but I bet I’ll find them since my plan is to super clean. I did find 4 missed plastic eggs that afternoon cleaning the bookshelf, they were pretty well hidden.
Easter food focused on just the 5 of us. We had a breakfast guest who also witnessed the egg hunt and then helped with the house and then went home again. Pancakes for breakfast, Lox and bagels for lunch, and Rack of Lamb with homemade french fries and asparagus for dinner. Niamh made a pie, two actually, but that is another story. I’m just glad she is interested in cooking.
Some things I planned did happen, others didn’t, but I think the weekend went pretty well. The kids entertained themselves mostly and helped a bit. They are old enough to all shower solo and understand that “mommy is a bit stressed right now”. By the end I felt like I had spent hours at the gym when all I did was move furniture, scrub floors/walls/trim, wash windows and pick up and move a million little things to either the trash, its home, or a box for storage.
Today the plan is to stop doing new projects and continue pulling it all together again. We have a contractor coming to power wash and do a few minor outside things. I have a meeting on the new house to pick plumbing. Lars is back to work and the kids are back to school. I feel bad about not doing my normal holiday reach out to friends but I’m sure everyone will understand. By next week I’ll be in maintenance mode only and while that won’t be nothing it sure won’t be the job it is to get to the ‘show ready’ we nearly are.
We are back 🙂
The kids are fine, the adult in charge of the kids is fine, the house is even fine. I call this a success. We filled in the balance of the afternoon with snuggles.
My only complaints about the weekend are because we are entirely spoiled. The restaurant we choose had a fairly small menu and Lars had a good dish but mine was super bland and not what was on the menu. The breakfast was similar – I cook breakfast foods well enough to know that these were not fresh, they were ok but nothing to rave about. So because we cook too well we are too fussy about the food out in the world. The house was a cool old Victorian with tons of original woodwork and furnishings. It was authentic enough I didn’t want to plug anything extra in and made note of the fire exits just in case. We met another very nice couple and learned a bit of the history of the house. Technically nothing I didn’t guess but the owners were not there and they actually know more details.
We had an odd amount of time this morning so we ended up stopping for Thor Ragnarock and I very much enjoyed it. The theater was a ‘bistro’ so you could order lunch or snacks and there were seats with tables like a first-class airline so it was a very good experience. The movie itself was well done, you can’t help but be inspired by hero movies – heroes are the ones running toward the danger, that is what they do.
Overall a very nice getaway. It is a little town about an hour away and we choose it nearly at random because we just wanted something interesting and unknown to us and that it was. We discovered that they have some really awesome playgrounds and also a great 20mile bike trail so we will probably be back in the spring so the guys training for their 150-mile ride can do a practice round. We also didn’t get to tour what the town was originally famous for – the pottery – but we did go to the shoe museum and saw two very familiar pairs of boots; one my grandfather wore in WWII as a paratrooper and the other my parents wore as 70’s era mountain climbers.
I hope it won’t be years before we do something like this again but it was a special way to celebrate our 13th anniversary.
Today, the day after Halloween, we have our mishmash of religions rolled up into a day to remember those of our family and friends that have died.
Fortunately again, we have made another year without a personal addition to the list.
The point of the exercise is to keep the person alive in our minds, to remember them, for their lives to continue to have an impact and be a part of ours at least one day a year. I have an album with all our people in it but it is packed away for the move so we will have to do something different for the kids this year.
There is one person who is more real to us in death than she was in life… There was a girl killed on the road right by the highschool and her friends and family have made the pole near the site a memorial to her. She was 18, her name was not published in the paper but it is on her pole so we know it but I’ll respectfully not publish it either. It is a version of my name so I’m unlikely to forget. The memorial is diagonally across from a traffic light we stop at every day on our trip to school and at some point last year the girls noticed and asked about it. We talked about what happened and lessons learned on both sides. They are all three extremely sad for a life cut short and also pretty upset for the person who hit her. We have absolutely no idea what happened to the driver but she will not be the same either.
The thing is, that was not the end of it. We see it every day. Whoever is maintaining it is doing a very good job. A good job in both that they are keeping it clean and updated for seasons and also keeping the awareness of their friend or family in the minds of others. Who knows if they will ever know that there are 3 kids who consider this memorial nearly daily. They send good thoughts to the family sometimes and wonder what she might have done if she were still alive others. I do hope they find comfort in their efforts even if they never think it extends beyond themselves.
You know that learning happens all the time, things you don’t expect at times you don’t plan. This girl is remembered, she is teaching, she is not alive but she is present daily. That is my Dio de Muerto as well as my Monday to Friday.
If you lost someone this year I hope you find comfort and remember them today.