Head still above water

Hello!  Guess what?  I have a 5 year old!  and she isn’t the oldest, she is my youngest.  Fiona, my change baby (not that change…) is again having a birthday in the middle of a giant life change.  She will get her birthday post and I’m also full of other post too, much like the pairing down of possessions one wants to move I have had to pare down what I can actually do in my life.  My normal workouts have been dropped to what I can do while they are at swim lessons and 2x other people have brought them so I could do more house stuff.  Blogging is on the casualty list too and unfortunately, so is watching TV or reading so busy with all the things!  Today I’m going to use my WHOLE computer hour on the blog so get ready for lots of words.

I am getting feeling flashbacks from other times in my life when many important things were going on at the same time.  I used to make lists of the major things and their due dates and I did actually get every paper turned in, was on time for every exam, and moved out in good order in college.  This is a whole new level of the game though because those things were black and white – move out meant take all your stuff and put it in the car and drive home to Long Island.  This time I can’t just clean sweep it all, I need to stage in my wake AND we are living her AND we don’t know where we are actually moving to OR when.

So to the people that I’m not there for like normal,  I am very sorry…  I hope this is all for the good and I can get back to being a good friend again.

On the positive side – I am not pregnant!  that was not actually a concern at all but this would be WAY worse if I was and when you are in birthday season you think about that 9th month and the tiny baby and resulting world shift and this is not that.  It is something different, but, it holds the same promise of a new beginning and the waiting and the uncertainty of ‘when’ and ‘what’ have a lot of similarities.  I also have kids that while not totally helpful are big enough to not need my constant care.  5 years ago I was starting the stay at home mom life and that was another giant shift in my life.  All 6 little eyes on me for all the things.  No break, not a lot of help, and the brain activity of trying to make all the things work in a new envelope of time without dropping too many important things too often.  Like I said, I am having feeling flashbacks because this is not the first time I’ve done something stressful of juggled things or worked with

Like I said, I am having feeling flashbacks because this is not the first time I’ve done something stressful of juggled things or worked with uncertainty and major decisions.  Thankfully they are all things I think I managed to get through pretty well and hopefully this one is no different.

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all the way across our monkey bars solo!

Sine this is my blog I’m going to pat myself on the back for my yesterday achievements.  5 years ago I produced a person from my body who knows the alphabet and can do the whole monkey bar solo but still eats boogers.  Yesterday I got up early to do my contract work, then greeted the birthday girl.  We made pancakes and whipped cream and sang and she was happy.  Dealt with some sister jelly attitude without losing it.  Got all kids and pup into the car and to carpool on time and to school perfectly.  Had coffee with a Vacation Mom who took Fiona out for her birthday (and my work day) and they went to the zoo and dairy queen while I finished contract work, got all the things on cabinets or walls or hooks in the entire kitchen level packed or put away or in the sell/donate pile.  I cleaned up days of ignored kitchen.

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In the afternoon I met the kids and kept working on the kitchen.  When the painter got here it was at least at 90% ready and coincidently Lars was done working so we did Fiona gifts outside under our favorite tree.  She loved everything from everyone, 5 is a happy age.  She was as happy with the pack of gum as the scooter.  They played and I went back to chipping away.  I paused to help all 3 girls get ready for jujitsu – you heard that right all THREE of them went to jujitsu with Lars.  The plan was for them to get birthday dinner out after as well as a trip to storage and be home for cake.  I moved on to the green room where I started packing and styling the giant built in book case while the kitchen was painted.  I threw in a batch of brownies that was done just as they came home and we sang happy birthday with my parents on the iPad on our back deck and then the girls enjoyed our long daylight with playing outside until nearly 9.  Not done yet!  I actually looked at Zoe’s folder and noticed she was on the 1st for snack in June and I actually remembered in the store on Tuesday night so I had things in the house to make the final cute class snack.  Niamh was the trooper on this, delaying her own bedtime to help me do them.  The day was finally over and the living room was enough together we could actually watch 1 tv show.

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In more full truth, because that really does have the ring of super mom, I’m like a duck with the frantic feet but the top level looks pretty good.  We did gifts on the lawn and ate on the deck because there is not one place to sit in the entire kitchen because the table and chairs are holding all the things either unsorted or normally on a wall that plan on going back.  I put in brownies 15min before they got back because I completely forgot until that second.  Seeing Zoe’s snack day was more happy accident than good parent that looks at all the papers in the folder.  Gifts were purchased 2 days in advance via amazon and 1 I knew would be late and 1 just didn’t show up yesterday…  the others were gotten in a walmart trip the night before that I made after seeing a house.  I’ve gone to lots of hardware and paint stores in the past 2 weeks but we are pretty low on groceries – good way to get the refrigerator and pantry clean!

I think that I’m doing ok but there are pinch points where I just wish it were easier.  I am making progress but the list is still very very long.  Vacation mom and Lars are both makigng it much better and I’m happy we have a painter friend who can help us because if I was doing this all alone I would be a giant mess and I’m glad his wife is ok with him being here so much. The goal is to have the house ready to have pictures on Tuesday and start showing when we are gone to NY.  I’m torn between wanting to be here to make sure the house is perfect and wanting to remove 3 kids and a puppy from the equation….  Any crossed fingers or good wishes are welcome as we keep doing the do.

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