Zoe cry it out
Spoiler alert – she now goes to sleep! Alone! in her crib!
Poor Zoe. Second child don’t get their cry it out live blogged, they get notes in the iPhone to be created into a post 5 days later. Ironically when I looked up the post for that link I realized that the dates are very similar, March must just be when I get to the end of my rope. However, I’m a month early relatively speaking so progress is being made.
I knew we had to do this months ago but in order to let Zoe cry we had to move Niamh and to move Niamh we had to empty the room, put all that stuff somewhere, then make her new room pretty (own post) and that took over a month longer then planned. The Monday night I hauled her bed down two levels to just be done already I decided it was cry it out night one. Lars was not home at the time but agreed in principle that this was the plan.
Again, poor Zoe, she does not have the bedtime ritual that Niamh did and that is what all the books say to establish. We do generally do the same things every night; washing, brushing, diapers, various creams and ointments and lotions, PJ’s and then a book but the order is never exactly the same and Zoe looses interest in the Niamh length book. Usually Niamh goes to bed first and I have snuggle nursing time and in the past waited until Zoe fell asleep (sometimes many hours would pass). Monday I did the same but when she unlatched instead of plugging her in again I burped her and then read the 5 page bedtime book that we used with Niamh. Then I sang her song put her in bed, told her good night and shut the door. Wailing ensued. My trusty timer said she wailed for 5min and then fussed for 15. At 15m ‘the rules’ say to go pat her and reassure her you are still there but she needs to sleep. This renewed the wailing for a few minutes but then back to fussing. Lars and I are enjoying a meal where I don’t have an infant attached to me – callous I know, but, she really was fine, just mad at missing the party. She went 3 more rounds – one she was asleep but leaning uncomfortably on the bars so in moving her we woke her up. Then she pooped, then it was almost 10 so I took pity and fed her because she had been quiet for a while. Depends on how you look at it but in some ways she won round one, in others we did, so we call it a draw.
Night 2 – I’m at school – I have no idea if Lars followed my mini routine but he reported she was down in 2 rounds
Night 3 – Wednesday – execute mini routine again, I actually got to fold laundry and let my brain rest in the evening for once because she only went 1 round.
Night 4 (the ‘rules’ say it should only take 3 but given the draw on night one we persist) – Pretty good, only one round
Night 5 – Friday – odd day in general because we are out later then normal, she fell asleep in the car, fussed for 2 seconds and was out in her crib
Night 6 – tonight – no wailing but a solid 10 of fussing still but out before 20m
I noticed on Wednesday that she knew what was coming because as soon as I started singing her song she started to protest. I think that is the point of the routine, a steady predictable march toward bedtime with a signal that the day is done that is constant. Books all over the place say babies like routine so we are doing our best. I like routine too but life just does not always comply. I am very very glad to have evenings back post 7:30 – it has been a long hard 9 months with just about no time to truly call my own. Niamh’s transition to her new room was interesting too but I’ll document that another day. Lets just say the term ‘ninja’ applies.
PS. I know not everyone agrees with the cry it out method, but, it works for us and I know for sure that the crying is because she is tired/mad, not scared, hungry, or uncomfortable – Zoe has very easy crys to distinguish.