Archive | June 3, 2009

Minnesota nice I am not

For those not from here, Minnesota nice (in my opinion) is the term coined for people born and raised in MN who are inclined/trained to be nice to someone’s face no matter what and then not so nice behind their back.  I am not a huge fan of this and I think it causes much more problems then it saves.  Sure, I was taught if you don’t have something nice to say don’t say anything at all and I was taught that you can usually find something good abut most people HOWEVER I was also taught that if something is bothering you it is much better to politely confront the issue and try to work it out.  That is where the MN nice fails for me.  *aside* not all people here are like that, and most are not like that all the time, but it is a sociological difference I have had to get used to.

Anyway, we were all at the park last week and two kids come over and are playing.  The girl was tiny and about 7, the boy (brother?) was beefy and about 10, they were picking on each other, and fighting and that was not awesome but really not harming much.  Then the girl climbs up onto one of the harder/higher parts of the playground and the boy starts shaking the support.  Girl starts screaming, sounds really scared, and really does look like she is going to fall, boy think this is great fun.  Other family on the park is pretending nothing is happening while this girl is screaming as if she is being murdered…. I look at Lars he looks at boy, boy ignores glare so I think to myself; ‘Time to do some parenting’ and I walk up to boy and sternly say “where is your mother, why are you doing this, stop right now and go home”.  Boy stops either because of the shock that someone called him on his behavior or because Lars was looking imposing behind me but girl takes the opportunity to get down, get on her bike, and more or less run.  Boy sullenly tries to talk back and I told him if he cannot behave, he should go home now, and he leaves.  This entire thing took about 2 minutes and then there was relative peace again.  The sad part was the other parents who after the dust settled, thanked us for taking care of that, they said it happens all the time and nobody ever says anything.  I suppose that is the east coast outspoken coming out but really, how is it nice to not stop one kid from torturing another?  It is Minnesota Nice…