Last week…. amid long drawn out rituals of bedtime where Niamh basically cried unless we obeyed her every whim (her whims were wanting to be held, watch tv with us, and unfettered access to the milk bar while randomly kicking my dinner) I came to the conclusion that this must end. She was crying anyway so why not have it be productive.
3/16 – bedtime;bath with lavender, diaper, PJ’s, story or 2, and a little night time nursing that she more or less fought. Go to her room and rock/sway while she winds up. Put her in her bed apx 8:15 and left.
8:15-8:40 constant angry crying – I did my eyebrows and sorted the mail.
8:40 I go in to comfort her and she winds up more, leave after about two min
9pm we crack and go get her. Feeling of parental failure abound (only a little)
9:05 – milk bar flowing, I’m eating my dinner over her and I drink a beer hoping she will atleast sleep well from this point on.
3/16 – renewed fortitude, team parent WILL win. Internet assures us that up to 2 hours of crying can happen. She was mad crying, not hungry or hurt or even sad – just mad. I used the mental image of putting $10 on the table ever 5min she cried and if I gave in I lost it all. Plus, this really is better for us all and at this point she won’t remember anything.
Same basic bedtime except no bath and we walk around a little with the sling. In bed at 8:15 screaming again. This time I stay with her for 15min telling her it is ‘ok’ and she mostly stares at me and screams.
8:30 reassure her for the millionth time that I love her and shut the door.
set watch for 5 min intervals.
Lars and I trade going in for 1 min every 5, then 10, then 15, then another 15, and we were rounding the third 15 when she fell asleep!!!! We made sure she was still breathing and she was curled up in a tiny ball in her crib but otherwise ok.
She remains asleep until 11:45 nurses, goes back to sleep. I call this a win, Day 1; an hour and 10min roughly. During this we watched The Tutors and I remarked repeatedly that while the sets and story are great, they are not wearing any underwear and it is disturbing.
3/17 – we have to go to Ikea because our cabinet doors have arrived so we ironically I ate Swedish meatballs and Lars had a greek salad on St Patricks day. If it helps, we are drinking a beer now at home. Anyway, this was an off routine day but I was not going to let that stop me. Niamh fell asleep on the way home but woke up for PJ and diaper change at 8:30.
8:30-8:35 things were looking good, she was leaning on me and acting sleepy
8:36 put her in crib and mad howling begins, I stay about 2 min and then leave
8:50 crying has been on and off but she is still going so I go and pat her back. She seems to be glad I’m there but not manically trying to climb the crib to cling to me. I put her nuk in her mouth and that makes a big difference (this time, all other times she tossed it,sometimes at me) and she even put her head down. I spent 5 min patting her back and she was up and down a bunch of times.
8:55 I leave with her pretty calm but not asleep.
Next 10 min off an on whimpers but never a full on wail and then quiet. 9:15 asleep! Day 2; 40 min. I spent the next 20 min reading stuff for school and then began documenting this saga. Sorry if this is dull to people but I want to accurately remember this in the future not idealize it.
The good thing is that this method is not mom or dad exclusive since we traded back and forth and no nursing was involved at all so tomorrow when I’m at school Lars can do this. I’m hopeful that the 3 day rule works and by the weekend she might go to bed with little fuss. …